Metalenema Episode 12-19-18

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Last show of 2018, and we go out with a bang! Nothing but combat metal (as opposed to war metal, we'll explain)! God Jul, y'all!



Metalenema Episode 12-12-18 - Best of 2018

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Metalenema's Album of the Year!

A lot of good stuff came out this year, not that you'd realize it from looking at some of the best-of lists floating around many "metal" media outlets. We got the goods for you, though - some you loved, some you missed, some you should revisit. Strap yourself in for three hours of metal excellence!


Top 5 of 2018

1) Funeral Mist, "Hekatomb" - Arioch returns to the fray in a sneak attack that strips the material back to the lean, mean days of Devilry. Vocal contortions, blasts for days, and daring musical asides will leave you confounded and condemned.

2) Vargrav, "Netherstorm" - A whirling maelstrom of Finnish symphonic black metal that points towards the best efforts of early Emperor and Kataxu. What's not to love?

3) Atroce, "Necromantiae Bestialis" - Quebec continues to dominate the deepest depths of the underground with this blistering spell of violent black death.

4) Omegavortex, "Promo 2018" - From the ashes of the vaunted German act Beyond comes its next twisted iteration. If this is just a simple promo, the official full-length is probably going to top our "Best of 2019" list.

5) Taphos, "Come Etherial Somberness" - One of the new onslaught of Danish death metal acts, Taphos does its share of the heavy lifting and comes out on top of the heap.

The Master List:


Metalenema Episode 12-5-18 - Messe Des Morts 2018, revisited

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We had an outstanding fucking time at Messe Des Morts! So outstanding, in fact, that we didn't get around to doing any live coverage! Instead, we bring you a show jam-packed with festival favorites and some new releases!



Metalenema Rewind: Thanksgiving Booger Wall , 11-23-06

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Happy Thanksgiving! The guys will be back at the beginning of December, with live coverage from the Messe Des Mortes Festival in Montreal, the Best of 2018, and much more!



Metalenema Episode 11-7-18 - Never Surrender Fest Roundup!

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DJ Slitzkrieg returns from Berlin with his review of Never Surrender Fest, and The Undertaker nearly runs over a guy while driving them home from the airport!



Metalenema Episode 10-31-18 - Wampyric Halloween with Gary Oldman as Dracula!

It's Hallo-waaaayne everybody! And Gray Oldman as Dracula returns to the show to co-host an all-Wampyric Black Metal special while making nauseating vampire noises! We're stokered to have him!



Metalenema Episode 10-24-18

New Profanatica makes its debut, and we recount the Texas Chainsaw Massacre show from last weekend! Most metal!



Metalenema Episode 10-17-18

More new stuff this week, including a new track from the upcoming Corpsessed album! Woo!



Metalenema Episode 10-10-18

We got a ton of awesome new releases on the show tonight, along with stupid stories about toys from the 70s!



Metalenema Episode 9-12-18

Oh boy! We got a lot of fresh cuts from bands like Mare, Necromaniac, and Acrimonious!



Metalenema Episode 9-5-18

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In this episode, we find out what kind of woman the elderly gents prefer. Also, lots of show debuts from bands even we haven't heard of!



Metalenema Episode 8-29-18

Blaine Lotz of Edna, Kan., is this year's winner of the prestigious World Livestock Auctioneer Championship, hosted by the Livestock Marketing Association.

The guys talk about a lot of stupid shit you don't care about while playing the usual excellent music!



Metalenema Episode 8-22-18


Back from our weeklong hiatus! We recap the recent Slayer and Varathron concerts, and debut new tracks from Condemner and Necroblood!



Metalenema Episode 8-8-18

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We squeezed in an episode in between other crap we were doing. New tracks from Chthe'ilist and Embrace of Thorns!



Metalenema Episode 8-1-18

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This week, The Undertaker tells a story about a schoolyard fight, and also plays a new song from Mortuus! 


Metalenema Episode 7-25-18

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This week the guys spend a lot of time talking about things you don't care about, like opportunities they missed with girls, and the fact that soap operas are bizarre. They also play some pretty good songs, though, so there's that!



Metalenema Episode 7-18-18 - All Aussie!

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Metalenema is pleased to announce that we're now a part of Australia's own Sentinel Daily, a metal news and journal that actually produces intelligent content (imagine that)! New episodes will be streamed there weekly, giving more people than ever a chance to find us annoying and silly!

To celebrate this new partnership, we're doing an all-Australian metal episode, chock-a-block with death and black metal blokes! Tuck in!



Metalenema Episode 7-11-18

Immolation just played in India, so we're bringing this joke back one more time. Also, the revival of calling someone a "Dordevic", as well as new tracks from Immortal, Embrace of Thorns, Angantyr, and more!



Metalenema Episode 7-4-18: DTF 14 Weekend!

Destroying Texas Fest 14 was yet another wild ride, with good times, good bands, and good people. We covered it live, so check it out and ask yourself why you aren't coming to this awesome fest!



Metalenema Episode 6-20-18

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Slitzkrieg got t-boned the other day, but he still managed to do this week's show! What a trooper!



Metalenema Episode 6-13-18: All Swearing Episode

Metalheads have potty mouths, but since many people can't understand their lyrics, it tends to go unnoticed. Celebrate profanity with Metalenema!



Metalenema Episode 6-6-18: National Day of Slayer special!

Happy (Inter)National Day of Slayer! This is an auspicious one, because it's the last year of this holiday with Slayer as an active band (at least as far as we know). It sucks to say goodbye, but at least they left years of amazing material to enjoy.

The playlist is huge and full of live rarities, so we aren't going to list it all (sorry, Mario), but you know the songs anyway. If you don't, you've got a lot of catching up to do!


Also, in lieu of the playlist, please refer to the guidelines of how to celebrate the world's one true heavy metal holiday!

From NationalDayofSlayer.org:

How to Celebrate

  • Listen to Slayer at full blast in your car.
  • Listen to Slayer at full blast in your home.
  • Listen to Slayer at full blast at your place of employment.
  • Listen to Slayer at full blast in any public place you prefer.
DO NOT use headphones! The objective of this day is for everyone within earshot to understand that it is the National Day of Slayer. National holidays in America aren't just about celebrating; they're about forcing it upon non-participants.

Taking that participation to a problematic level

  • Stage a "Slay-out." Don't go to work. Listen to Slayer.
  • Have a huge block party that clogs up a street in your neighborhood. Blast Slayer albums all evening. Get police cruisers and helicopters on the scene. Finish with a full-scale riot.
  • Spray paint Slayer logos on churches, synagogues, or cemeteries.
  • Play Slayer covers with your own band (since 99% of your riffs are stolen from Slayer anyway).
  • Kill the neighbor's dog and blame it on Slayer.


Metalenema Episode 5-30-18: The Morning Zoo Returns!

Buckle up for some morning metal hijinx from The Hyena and our newest co-host, DJ Slutzbang! They're gonna be so waaaaaaaaaaaaaacky for you, just tune in and go nuts!


Metalenema Episode 5-16-18

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Metalenema is back! The Undertaker and Slitzkrieg had a bunch of stuff to do, but now they are here again to bash your heads in (and also play some good metal). Chicago bands rule the roost this time, along with a debut from Texas' Pious Levis!



Metalenema Episode 4-18-18

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"Whut, are you Gontyna Kry now?"
Due to a technical error, we couldn't give you this episode. Don't kry, though. It's here now!